This is about anxiety and peaceful places. Turns out: “peaceful” isn’t always located where we think it is.
As mentioned in a previous post, my social struggles during elementary school created an intense fear of other people. I sought out friendships, but lacked the basic communication skills necessary to traverse the social world. What I did not understand at the time: I lacked body language and was not picking up on the nuances of non-verbal cues. I was blind, in other words, to a large portion of the shared context that I experienced with other kids. Needing people, interested in others, I walked- repeatedly- into the buzz saw of rejection.
My self-confidence eroded. I became quiet, withdrawn. And afraid.
In a strange way, the situation improved once the social world became more complicated. [Read more…]